You Stole My Heart… Do I Have To Take Your Name?

A Guide to (Not) Changing Your Name Upon Marriage

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Name changes are yet another decision when it comes wedding planning – and one which can cause couples considerable friction and heartache.

You Stole My Heart… Do I Have to Take Your Name? will help you decide on a name you’re happy with – and show you how to communicate your preference to your partner, family, friends, and colleagues.

But this book is much more than a how-to guide. It is a meditation upon the traditions of surnames and marriage, designed to both give engaged couples all of the insight you need to feel confident in your decision, and to help marriage celebrants, MCs, wedding suppliers, and everyone who has to attend a wedding, navigate this often prickly topic. In short, You Stole My Heart… Do I Have to Take Your Name? is a book for everyone interested in relationships and names.

Names are important. They tell those around us who we are, and where we came from. To some extent, our names can even influence where we’re going. Studies show our names affect our job prospects, our chances of fame, or success in business.

While it mightn’t be as exciting as choosing flowers, a cake, or music, the decision to – or how to, or not to – change your name is one which has much longer-lasting effects.

No one will be talking about the catering or dress code of your wedding on a daily basis in ten years. But they will be using your name! You Stole My Heart… Do I Have to Take Your Name by linguist Dr. Sarah Pasfield-Neofitou (PhD) will help you make that decision with confidence.

Although talking about names with your partner or family can be a tricky subject, the good news is, couples now have more options than ever before.

Here’s a preview of what you’ll learn…

  • How to decide on a name that will make you happy – and communicate your preference to your partner, family, friends and colleagues
  • Why changing your name – or not – can result in conflict (and how to resolve it!)
  • How to deal with family, professional, and social pressures
  • The history of name changes
  • How name changing traditions differ by culture
  • New traditions for same-sex marriages
  • The pros and cons of changing your name vs. not
  • All the options in between – hyphenation, hybrid names, middle names, and more
  • Tips on titles, pronunciation, spelling, initials, and your name as a whole
  • How to announce your name – whether you’re changing it or not